Hassani Kwess- "The Mixtape's Day Off"

Download here: http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.zshare.net%2Fdownload%2F552086025ee27550%2F&h=f6161eb4111a90a15f5ab9c95e9df810.


The homeslice Hassani Kwess has arrived with his sophmore effort, "The Mixtape's Day Off". Despite the title, this tape is as far from a day off as Chris + Rihanna's relationship...now (that was my one and only time making fun of them). Anywho after a thorough listen of this project, it's no question that Kwess knows his hip hop roots.

This mixtape plays like the lovechild of 2 Chucks. Chuck D (of Public Enemy) and Chuck Inglish (The Cool Kids).

Old School Flavor Meets New School Fresh.

The Strongest Cuts: "Hi, My Name Is Donovan (D-Nice)", "The 80's", "2 Funky"

Rating: 4 Bongs Out of 5.

Keep on taking those days off Kwess. Cuz i'd hate to see you @ work. lol.


-eli.

and here's the link again for you retards: http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.zshare.net%2Fdownload%2F552086025ee27550%2F&h=f6161eb4111a90a15f5ab9c95e9df810.

The Break Up Letter.

So I'm recently coming off of a pretty hurtful breakup.
And for some reason or another this is that much funnier to me because of my breakup.
It lets me know that even stupid people have relationship problems too.

http://youmakemetouchyourhandsforstupidreasons.ytmnd.com/

the guy who thought of doing this is quite the genius.


-Cody "bong out with your dong out" Love

The Future Of Music.

i'd sign.
bong.
eli.

Cody's Happy?/ The New Plan

Me and Kendall are in some rough times right about now.



Speaking on my behalf I'm currently unemployed and coming off of one of the worst weeks of my life.

As I sit with the noise of a crying baby in one ear and the sound of melted snow leaking into my room from the roof in the other, I reflect back on that 7 day span.

In 7 days: I was Dumped by the woman I "loved", and cut out of her life (sucks because she was one of my best friends), kicked out of every public place I went to(the lady at the ice skating rink is still a bitch), poor as all fuck due to being unemployed and my parents being too irresponsible to work, cracked my chin open and went to the hospital, mauled by a dog, and I've also lost a possible girlfriend candidate as well.

that's the short version.
doesn't really show you the bizarre circumstances to everything, but in any case, I should be down about shit.

I'm not.

I don't know why.

Maybe when I cracked my chin I got brain damage and I can't be anything but happy.

I coined the phrase: "Life is a fucked up video game, and I'm running in God mode."

and it's true.

I feel invincible right now, like nothing could pierce and damage me emotionally.


I say that to say this.........





I wanna kill emo's.

I've got to thinking about stuff.....

and I want to be what Hitler was to Jews, only in a less megalomaniac-ish manner.

Emos with real life problems are few and far between,
and that being said.....
their bitching has become rather bothersome.

So, I will kill them and create a master race of people who don't bitch about their problems while uploading fresh myspace pics and simultaneously painting their nails.

I will kill.


-nuff said.

Proof That Being A Pervert Pays.

-eli.

The Smexiest Song of 2009 So Far!!!

Notorious

Christopher George Latore Wallace,

better known as Biggie Smalls,

The Notorious B.I.G. or simply Big Poppa, is in many's eyes:

The best rapper of all time.

Did the best rapper of all time get one of the best bio pics of all time?

No.

The film doesn't do him justice.

Is the film bad though?

No.

Notorious is a standard bio pic that shows the struggles of Biggie, from the gutter to the top of the rap

industry, and the personal conflicts he faces when he is in fact on top.

Actor Jamal Woolard doesn't exactly do Biggie justice, but he is a good enough shoe in for the big guy

Angela Basset is a good Voletta Wallace,

and Derek Luke is a solid Puffy, if only because he dances all the god damn time.

Anthony Mackie is a poor choice for Tupac

and Marc John Jefferies is even littler than Lil Cease.

The best actor in the movie is the young lady who plays Lil' Kim.

Spot on portrayal of a whore.

Where the movie goes wrong:

1) Cliche bio pic moments meant to draw emotional reaction. Albeit, the ending of the movie nearly

made me cry.

2) Some bad acting.

3)Puffy didn't dance enough.

4)Jamal Woolard just can't match Biggies charisma, on or off the mic.

5)Lil Cease is forever young.

6)Feels a little lighter content wise than a bio pic should be, more or less jumping from key point to key

point of Biggies life leaving you wanting more detail on such an interesting life.

other than that:

solid movie.


I give it 7 and a half out of 10 bongs.

-Cody Love

Internet Hitler

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What We Be Listenin 2? (Cody)

....because kendall did it.

Folie a Deux by Fall Out Boy



Favorite Songs (because I have to pic one)

"The (Shipped) Gold Standard"

"20 Dollar Nosebleed"

illtacular.

Brain Thrust Mastery by We Are Scientists



Favs:

"Afterhours"

"Chick Lit"

Reasonable Doubt by Jay-Z



Favortization:

"Politics As Usual"

"Brooklyn's Finest"

it's illmaticism.



I haven't been diversifying my music past FOB, W.A.S., and Jay-Z this month.
Because they're just that good.
billabong.

The Capital L's starring in...Operation FucktheWorld (codename: Rockville ain't about shit).

feeling lucky, so i'ma post 2 in the same day.

yesterday, me and the white devil (cody)...decided to chuck our favorite finger at our hometown for a day and explore somewhere we have never been.

I had recieved a phone call from him the day earlier during which he described his plans to go to Rockville.

So being the best friend that i am...i figured...what the lucifer...i'll tag along and make it an adventure.

So after i finish wasting time with a lady friend i head to Casa De Love b/c the bastard who shall remain nameless (cody) decided not to answer the phone after the 65th ring (he later blames the missed phonecalls on a epic shit he was taking...yeah...i know)

Anywho, we met up and headed the metro station where we took the long journey to the far away land they called Rockville.

We filled the time on train with loud, obnoxious anecdotes about obscene things that will make the parents on the train go straight home and beat their children just for existing in the same generation as us...

We also sat next to a very sexy chick who was speakin' Russian we believe (call us! Send Stalin our love!)

Anywho once more, we got of the train at Rockville to make a startling discovery.

ROCKVILLE AIN'T ABOUT SHIT!!!

And when i say shit... i mean S.H.I.T. (Something Hardly Interesting To.....anyone)

The most we got outta our trip to Rockville was 90's nostalgia, a store that sells paper...and being followed by a fellow who looked like John Lennon and Ne-Yo's love child. (did i mention the paper store?)

So with that said we chucked the same finger that we gave Hyattsville previously and headed to White Flint.

Instantly, we saw a 7-11 right next to a McDonalds(*insert heavenly choir*)...which meant White Flint gave Rockville the super dick within' 4 seconds.

We then headed to White Flint Mall where we saw huge statues of horses with big grins...i then pointed out to Cody that those horses weren't really happy...because both of them were missing genitals!! (it's true...clean sheet...both of them)

After passing the ball-less horses we headed to the food court which reeked of more 90's nostalgia...and ordered pizza.

Mine was delicious...Cody's tastes like sweat...and shit...shitty sweat.

We then saw the coolest dude on the planet...no lie..
Dude was middle-schoolish and dragged his feet across the food court with his handy dandy Folder (no backpack) and a unlit cigarette lazily dangling from his bottom lip...

We assumed he was there to pick up all the "babes" that oozed outta that mall (oxygen tanks included).

After a long stay in Borders we headed back to the Ville...refreshed...
that is until i got locked in the station cuz the trip to nowhere broke my bank...hmph..

On behalf of Cody Love, this is Eli of the Cap L's saying...FUCK ROCKVILLE.

bong.

What Are We Losers Listening To? (Eli)

hola losers and loserettes,

I'd like to take this time to inform ya'll that me and the gringo (Cody) are very much in love with the same woman. That woman just has to be music. Now being me and Cody are best friends we evenly split time with her...I get her monday-sunday...he get whatever days are left. (heh heh...a funny).

Anyways both of us are under the control of Steve Jobs so we're gonna let you know what's jammin' in our ears every now and then...this here is my installment.
CLOSE MINDED PEOPLE DIE!!! ...no really.

here's just a few...

Blu & Exile- Below The Heavens



Fav. Songs: "The World Is (Below The Heavens..)", "The Narrow Path", "Show Me The Good Life"


Fall Out Boy- Folie A Deux



Fav. Songs: "America's Suitehearts", "What A Catch, Donnie", "w.a.m.s."

Frank Sinatra- Nothing But The Best



Fav. Songs: "Drinking Again", "That's Life", "My Way", "The Best Is Yet To Come"

The Beatles- Magical Mystery Tour



Fav. Songs: "Strawberry Fields Forever", "Penny Lane", "All You Need Is Love"

Mos Def- The New Danger



Fav Songs: "Blue Black Jack", "Sunshine", "Grown Man Business", "Ghetto Rock"

Perverts In Public Bathrooms, a Cody Love adventure.

So I'm on hiatus from my hometown for a while to explore the metropolitan area a bit and do some soul searching, away from the internet and people in Hyattsville that aggravate me.

I have no real content to share with you that has any relevance with pop culture or anything,

but

I thought I'd get online long enough to share with you a story that happened amidst my adventuring.


While traveling through Montgomery County I stopped at a mall.
Mall's in Mo. Co. are filled with abnormalities...
but today was particularly abnormal.

Arriving at the Wheaton metro station, an old Chinese midget woman said something to me about looking like her son....
creepy.

Birds flew around in the food court of the mall, and people didn't seem to care that there food was at risk of getting shat in.
odd.

Men walked around in tight pants with rainbow hair.
Rather epicene.

Amongst the oddities of this mall, I had to use the bathroom...


MISTAKE.

I entered the bathroom with haste, my digestive system had punished me for a binge of McDonalds, and while walking to my stall, an old Hispanic fellow smiled at me while he urinated.

IT FREAKED ME THE FIGGIDY FUK OUT.

I attempted to think nothing of it and attend to my business....when somebody tossed pornagraphic material over my stall. As I sit on the toilet pantsless, a picture of a young latino girl getting pounded quite harshely dropped to my feet.

SCARED ME SHITLESS....QUITE LITERALLY

I didn't quite know how to react, but I did know I had to get out of there because I ran the risk of getting raped. While pulling up my pants I noticed that there was a personal message attached to the porn. I didn't care to read, because that would further my chances of getting raped.

While rushing to wash my hands and get the hell outta dodge, a janitor asked me, "Is this your porn?"

I replied "Fuck no."

"You know it's illegal to beat off in public right?"

I reply

"Dude...It's not my porn."

Then I thought to myself....what if the janitor wants to rape me.

I leave.

When I leave another Hispanic fellow is waiting outside the bathroom....I figured he was waiting for his wife or someone who was attending the womens bathroom....but I sped quickly out of the fascinaty for fear of my ass being violated by him.

While speed walking, I noticed he was following me.

I quickly avoided him by going back into the Borders I was previously in before the bathroom fiasco.


.....I'm now scared to death of public bathrooms.

Go figure that me taking time to get away from things leads to nearly getting raped.

If worse came worst, I would have to kill to protect my ass.

bong.

-Cody Love (on hiatus from the Hyattsville)

An Introduction To Mr.Love

So, This is my first post and I'm excited.

I was going to wait a while and let Eli do all the work with this.....like I do with everything else.....

BUT I refuse to be upstaged.

First and foremost, I'd like to set the record straight, I am the baddest mo'fudger on this here blog.
Not the second as Mr.Elijah would like you to believe.
For the record I am the baddest fudger to ever fudge a mo'.
Period.
End of discussion.

Second off

Eli basically gave the breakdown on what this blog is all about so......

Third

Eli isn't the only one that can put up funny shit from the internet.

Bong this shit right hurrr.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

in conclusion.

I'm Cody Love
I'm illy vanilly.
Kendall Elijah is a poopoo head dummy.

and this is The Losing Team.

look forward to some shit with substance in the future.

diddy kong bong.


-Cody Love

Think The Jesus Story Is Gettin' Old??

Aaron McGruder (creator of the Boondocks) is a muhfriggin genius!!!
http://www.boondocksbootleg.com/

And Now Introducing...THE LOSING TEAM!!!

Greetings Blog Reader,

My name is Eli or Kendall Elijah if your nasty. Me and my partner in crime who is also the 2nd baddest mo'fudger on this mo'fudger, Cody Love, finally popped a few rounds into procrastination (no jury is going to convict us, trust me) and decided to deliver a blog to whoever may want to ponder into our brains.

Together we make up The Capital L's.

Together we started our up-and-comin' indie label, 16 Bit Dreams

and Together we make what you want to be and should be but your lack of testes prevents.

Basically, this blog shall be a journey for us and everyone who participates as we post the random ishtaki we find on the internet, music from myself and every one we are involved with, just to name a few.

So strap your seatbelts, cuz neither one of us is a good driver.

“There's nothing wrong with being a loser, it just depends on how good you are at it”

-Billie Joel Armstrong (of Green Day)

and oh yea...we say bong alot so prepare your annoyance triggers!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!

-eli.